The following are some ideas for the kinds of things that may go on a "What to do to Create Boundaries" list. These are not presented as comprehensive lists and they are not the right list for any one particular person. It is important for you to come up with you own personalized coping strategy lists.

Too Damaged for Love?

Maybe someday there will be somebody who
Will see beyond the masks I’ve worn
To the little girl who is not so strong,
To the frightened child locked deep within,
Who just needs true love to laugh again.

A time for me
Someday there’ll be
A time when love
Will set me free.

Maybe someday the walls will fall
Internal ones built big and strong
Which protect me from the fear and pain
But block my path to love again.

A time for me
Someday there’ll be
A time when love
Will set me free.

Maybe someday the scars will fade
They’ll be soothed away by a patient soul
Who’ll see beyond the broken girl
And help me let my dreams unfurl.

A time for me
Someday there’ll be
A time when love
Will set me free.

JoAnne

Silence

Silence in the walls of Brick
Made to keep me from the noise without.
I am nameless, faceless, confused
Scared to have, to hate.
Seems to never end.

Beaten, torn, ripped apart,
Taken away, set apart.
Healing wounds I begin to set
Then given to another set.
Given heaven so I was set.
In God they said to fear
Judge not unless you be judged.

Beaten, torn, ripped apart.
Build those walls.
Not again. Seems to never end.
Innocence I have kept.
The baby, the Love Rose
Never to forget.

Trying again
Bring down the walls
One Brick at a time.
Healing wounds never to part.
Never again I’m set apart.
Freedom is mine
MINE TO START.

Chandra

Proud Flesh

See me
I'm me, not you
Though as a child
I didn't know
where I ended
and you beegan.

I'm your daughter
I'm your sister
I'm not a sex object
See me,
I'm me, not you.

See me
NOW
I am a beautiful child
Bright and pure
In order to escape your eyes
I had to leave my body
With you
While I had to go somewhere else
Into blackness, scary but safe.

I can be part of this tree
Hidden in its curves and lines
No one can see me
I am covered and held
Here I am safe enough
to close my eyes
to sleep.

Beth

Boundary Problems Flare Up During Hard Times
Many times when you are overstressed or in a crisis, problems with boundaries are part of the issue. Identify what the boundary problems are and what can be done to shore up your boundaries. This can help you to feel more comfortable.

LIST #2 Make Yourself a List of "What to do to Create Boundaries"

• Tighten my belly
• Identify how I am feeling.
• Say what I think, at least to myself.
• Imagine a barrier around me.
• Cross my arms.
• Wear my shield pin.
• Etc... Make your own personalized list!!

 

Once an Old Story

November 24, 1997

I have no idea where to begin to shape this wax, to express, to be in touch with this old grief. I was a young boy, 11 years old - 47 years ago. Such a long time to carry old feelings and images of perpetrators. How could YOU let this happen to your child? How could a teacher use his friendliness, my trust, his seemingly authentic desire to mentor me? BUT NO. You didn’t take away my song, my strength, my love.

How do the words and music pin together to tell my story?

They didn’t take away my song.

Wishes made each and every day
Dreams are possible so many people say
We send out our wishes to see if they come true
They thought
They could take my song away

Jerry

Once an Old Story

Like a builder
I repair and prepare
my song

Frightened as I crawl
change - transform

trusting my love
your love

Once this old story
held my attention

Now I don’t need it

Jerry