Healing occures in relationship. The feelings of shame, worthless, and isolation from the abuse wrecked havoc on relationships and connections to others.

Eventually it is through connections with people that the survivor gets on with life. Caring and supportive people can be one of the strongest resources of healing.

It is important to think about what help or support you need and make a list of those whom you trust to turn to.

Dividing your requests for support between different people can ensure that you receive a helpful diversity of care. It will also prevent burning out one ally whom you have to lean on too much or too often.

Home at Last

Under a blanket she cries.
It's as though none have eyes.
For they do not see her need.
Sent to her room with no one near.
The knot holes in the walls cannot hear.
There's cloying loneliness within
And the inner voices raise a din.
In yellow flowers she takes delight
And after the rain in the sunshine bright.
Feeling alone and left behind
Her needs become clear in my mind.
My hand reaches back over time
To gently draw her home at last
To love and to comfort; for the child is mine.

Marjorie

With My Own Hand

To be open
means I invite promise;

Emerging
Means I can release
The sucking vines
With roots in my past;

To enliven
Means I can embrace more than
Destructive modes;

And I can hold myself
With tenacity,
Stay in line with heart power
To receive and embrace
What is hopeful.

Progress comes
with knowing and moving
To release myself into a space
Where I can reach for better connections
To sing my future
In my own voice
Attuned
To my architect
of delight.

I yearn for my release
With hand holds
Strong and tender
Wanting
The best for me
so I can ring the Bell Tower
with joy.

Jill

SEEKING ASSISTANCE OF YOUR SUPPORT PEOPLE

• List names with phone numbers. Clarify ahead of time what they can handle and what they cannot help with. Write down OK times to call them.
• Look through your address book.
• Use a buddy system.
• Form a support group.
• Support check-ins: Get a friend to phone or write you to tell you that you are safe and a good person.
• Designate a regular time to have check-ins with some people.
• Call your therapist.
• Call a crisis or help line.
• Call a trusted friend.
• Allow your pets to give you nurturing and support.
• Know that friends cannot always be there — have back up people.
• Write to a friend.
• Send e-mail.
• Call someone.
• Use the resources in your church or spiritual setting.
• Stay with a friend at your home or theirs.
• Take a class or workshop.
• Join a therapy group.
• Volunteer somewhere.
• Look after a child now and then.
• Have a slumber party.
• Seek encouragement from friends.
• Have a party.
• Use Internet support groups.
• Reconnect with someone special.
• Go for a walk, movie or shopping with a friend.
• Enjoy a pleasant activity with a friend.
• Listen to your favourite or upbeat music with a friend.
• Go dancing

"Follow Site Web Ring"
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