CHILD SEX RINGS and CHILD PROSTITUTION

My hand is strong
So you can't see
The fear of the child
Inside of me.
So touch my hand
And feel my pain
And promise to
Never let it happen again.

Sex rings and child prostitution involves power structures which actively recruit vulnerable children and youth.

Children used in sex rings are often subjected to terribly cruel and sadistic physical abuse in addition to sexual abuse. There is profound trauma associated with being used in child prostitution and child sex rings.

The impact of the abuse can be life-long, often resulting in emotional and physical problems as well as behavioural problems such: as prostitution, street youth, crime and homelessness.

Survivors often lose a sense of personal power and have difficulty making good, choices as adults.

For the survivor who was abused as a child by a group of adults there is no safe place. People "out there" do not offer safety and protection; survivors always feel isolated, powerless, helpless.

The survivor's adult body carries significant internal stress as a result of repeated early abuse. The high degree of stress causes an inordinate amount of physical and medical problems for survivors.

Memories of profound abuse can be recovered inside and outside of therapy.

Child prostitution and child sex rings exist in all countries and in all the major cities in North America. Even in some smaller communities there can be highly active and organized child sex rings.

FLIGHT

On a cool, clear black night

Upward rising
Arms open wide, whirling
In a free form flight
Quickened velocity diffusing
Skin from rapturous skin;
Remnants descend
Into your devouring hands
An unholy Eucharist
You made this skin
It belongs to you.

Garry

A CHILD'S GRIEF

Look inside the mirror
And discover who you are.
Be not afraid
Of what you may find
For it is only through the searching
Will you find the answers
To your life’s journey.

Imagine a mirror
Oval in shape,
The wood is oak,
Finely polished.
When I look closely,
I see a shadow image

Watching, seeing, yet unbelieving.
Rejecting the image
I am overwhelmed with sadness
For this image.

A child, small and alone;
I grieve for the child.
She was born; yet I sense no connection
To this child image.
I grieve for her lost childhood.

She tries desperately to seek non-existence
For beyond her imagination, there is safety;
Invisibility provides peace.

I tried to protect her,
She was helpless,
She could trust no one
She had only one – ME.
Oh, little one, it would be best if you were not
Born. I know in my soul there can be healing.

April.

THE GUILTY

The war is over
but the harm lingers
poisoning each day
with regret and remorse
that it ever had to be
ever had to happen.
The war of unlove,
it continues
day-in and day-out.
Some call is abuse
Some call it hate
Some call is selfishness
But it is the same face
with a different mask
for each brings harm
that only God can heal
that only forgiveness liberates;
Each brings pain
that lodges deep within
our spirits, our beings
and though invisible
is visible as the person struggles,
Struggles to go on,
Struggles to cope with the atrocities
committed against it,
Struggles with the anguish that never wanes
until it is removed by the hand of God,
Struggles to live in a world that condemns the weak
and applauds the guilty
For in this way people do not need to look at themselves and
accept responsibility for how they treat one another.
Did I say “treat”?
Perhaps I should say mistreat
for there is no goodness in harm
nothing to applaud
for it wreaks destruction
and only those with a wicked heart
delight in such things.
So tell me,
who are the innocent?
Are we not all guilty
of hatred, selfishness and abuse?
for the victimizer perpetrates
the evil in his/her heart
and the victim hates and
perpetrates the hatred to their own harm
of the abuse that they were subjected to and participated in
through fear, intimidation and ignorance.
The guilty are not guiltless.

Maria

NEVER TOO LATE TO LOVE

No matter what happened,
I need to love again.

No matter what happened,
I need to be love trustfully

No matter what happened,
I need to love myself first, then the world.

No matter what happened,
I need to love to live now.

My palpitating heart,
Strong in one hand,
Engorged in the other.

I feel the need to help, to protect,
And to give no matter what happened.

To love remains a daily job,
Especially to love the right way,
With trust and no condition.

Unique I will remain my whole life.
Unique is the child within me.
Unique is my growth.

Unique is my journey, my voyage
Through the fiber of my perceptions
At the horizon is my destination.

My heartbeat helps me going,
Patient, generous, humane, uplifting, friendly,
And who knows, maybe one day trustfully.

Francois

DUSK TO DAWN

As dusk turns to dawn, and dawn to dusk,
the world turns once around.
Memories of childhood days,
in grief and pain thus bound.

A shadow roams through your life
and follows where you go
To curse and bring destruction to what
it calls its foe.

They say that you should now forgive
and think not of the past
In your heart a light once burned
now fades so lightning fast.

If time could turn its hands on back,
and what was lost returned
If people thought of what they do
and lessons could be learned.

Still the world turns always round
and people do their harm
And still a child can be killed
with not the least alarm.

As dusk turns to dawn and dawn to dusk
For one it never will
For one so fragile, helpless, small
Its life is now so still.

Babette

Discussion - Child Prostitution and Child Sex Rings

Identification/Refinement of key themes:

1. A lack of public awareness, education and outreach.

2. Myths about sexual abuse, sex rings and a connection to prostitution.

3. Impact on an individual’s life - the survivor’s perspective.

4. Why is society in denial, and how is this accomplished?

5. How do pedophiles maintain their groups. How can they be identified? How to they propagate these activities?

Public Messages:

1. The reality of child sex rings and prostitution:

• Child sex rings and prostitution happens to children/individuals who are vulnerable, perhaps related to institutions as clients.
• Individuals from abusive situations are more likely to become involved in sex rings or prostitution than those who are not.
• When children are soliciting, there is no choice. Even when adults are soliciting, there are no choices.

2. Impact of abuse:

• There is a life-long impact resulting in internal (emotional, physical) and external (behavioural) problems.
• Disassociative disorder is real. Memory loss from trauma is real and can be recovered both outside and inside of therapy.
• Denial exists on the part of the abused and abuser.

3. Myths about the impact of abuse:

• Survivors have no sense of personal power, and are not capable of functioning as an adult and making good choices.
• Survivors are perceived as unable to function, and allowances are made for their dysfunction instead of a search for the cause of such dysfunction.

4. Impact

• How recovered memories affect an individual’s life and life choices.
• Sense of predetermined “fate” to continue in an abusive/abused capacity.
• Memories played out in symbolic forms such as disease, abuse of others or choice of an abuser as a partner, alcoholic or drug addiction, life long impact
• Suicidal thoughts tend to be more common among survivors.
• Impact of sex rings/prostitution on survivors: a complete sense of isolation; the message to the abused child is that society itself is responsible/corrupt; there is no “out there”, no safe place, no rescuer.

Why is society in denial, and how is this accomplished?

• Society is associated with the government/media.
• There is profit in denial. Abusers have a vested interest in denial and comfort.
• Comfort, vested interest and both conscious and unconscious guilt.
• Those who have not experienced this type of trauma have difficulty in understanding higher pain.
• Often those who attack survivors are often in denial about abusers and abuse.
• There are safety issues related to a lack of education on this topic.

Brainstorming:
There is a lack of public awareness of sex rings. There are many myths and a lack of perspective on the part of the public.

Prostitution and its connections to child abuse are unclear. The myth of prostitution is that they “do it because they love it”. Society is in denial - offers closure without examining the underlying issues behind prostitution. There is a lack of education around the issue of prostitution/abuse in the school system at every level.

The myth of pedophilia and child prostitution is that “young boys choose to participate.” How do pedophiles Organize and sustain their activities? Does the anonymity of the internet propagate these activities? Is a child sex ring a child used by a number of abusers? This is worse than the abuse of a child by a caregiver, because no bond is formed. The child is totally isolated. His or her abuser has no power within the group.

Survivors often develop strong defenses to cope, and may have very high pain thresholds. When the abuse occurs outside the family environs, the memories are often more difficult to access.

Memories may be triggered by specific words. There is often a lack of acknowledgement of the abuse by the abuser. A defense mechanism develops - the child is “special”. The photographic aspect of this type of abuse can encourage exhibitionistic behaviour.

The connection between prostitution and abuse is so obvious. Why is the public surprised by this? Survivors are vulnerable and often prone to being “seduced” into pornography and prostitution. Survivors also often feel that they are “fated” to continue in an abused capacity.

Myth of suppression:
People think that it is possible to bury memories without affecting the individual concerned. It is easier to blame the victim than the abuser. The survivor becomes “objectified” and develops a strong sense of denial as a coping mechanism. This is the reason behind the denial of this type of abuse by society. People are more concerned about protecting their own comfort level than protecting the comfort levels of children.

People do not want to confront the issues. “This type of thing doesn’t happen in Canada.” Social service agencies, law enforcement staff and others working in this field become desensitized, because the truth is so horrific. As well, the male identity in our culture encourages suppression of these issues, and the majority of institutions tend to be “male centred” in terms of their operational framework.

The Maple Leaf Gardens issue did generate a public outcry. However, this was bothersome, because of the media identification with the “hockey icon” image as a vehicle to address abuse issues. This disregards other survivors who are not associated with a “celebrity association”.

There are also issues associated with validation and celebrity endorsement. Another difficulty is presented by the incorrect association of abuse with lower economic class structures. The message is most often dependent upon the messenger for clarity and accuracy.

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